You’ve been thinking that your financial life could probably be better, right? Maybe you think, “If I could just stick to a budget everything will be fine…”, or how about “When I get that next raise or promotion, I’ll have enough money to pay off my debts and save some money…” You may even be thinking,”I can do this on my own!”
I hear these comments and more on a regular basis. I usually say, “Great! Can you think of any reasons your financial life isn’t perfect right now?”
It’s really your “little voice” which is prompting you to say all these things! Your little voice has a job to do and that is to protect you from any change because it “knows” that change will be hard or scary or cause more work and it’s just easier to keep things the way they’ve always been. Your current situation is something you already know and even if you don’t like it, you at least know what you already have.
Or maybe you feel it’s all up to you and it’s weak to have other people help you, especially when it comes to money. Besides, you might think, I’ll probably have to pay to get help!
People who challenge these thoughts and hire a financial coach find that their attitudes toward “getting help” changes dramatically within a couple of weeks. You’ll find someone you can tell everything to, literally. Your hopes, fears, dreams, problems – the whole lot and you can even drop the image that your life is perfect, that you know it all and that you can do it yourself.
The first thing you’ll notice is that your coach won’t judge you. You’ll be accepted as you are, even if there is room for improvement. You’ll find someone who will truly hear what you say and support you in your efforts to be an excellent money manager.
You’ll feel your dreams are something to be valued and you’ll encouraged to clarify them and move towards them. You’ll be asked challenging questions, you’ll think bigger, be clearer about the role of money in your life, and you’ll consider other possibilities!
Because coaching is a professional relationship, you’ll be working with someone who isn’t just going to say “yes” to you. You’ll know your coach has your best interests at heart when she challenges you. Your coach can help you see big picture when you get bogged down in the detail or run into difficulties. She’ll open up your thinking so you can see you are capable of more than you see for yourself. You’ll be encouraged to truly be your best, particularly when you are inclined to stop short of doing what’s possible for you.
Your little voice will be very happy to protect you from these wonderful experiences, especially if you’ve never experienced the opportunity to work with someone who is on the same playing field as you, open to brainstorming ideas and continually moving you forward. Your inner voice protects you from growing and being outside your comfort zone. Your little voice tries to stop you doing something, whether through fear or pretending you don’t need to do it. Your little voice is useful when it protects you from danger such as putting your hand in fire.
And, remember your little voice is extremely clever and powerful; after all it’s had a lot of practice! It will keep trying to find a way to stop you. You can be quick to identify your inner critic getting in the way, and it will find another way of stopping you. We’ve become so accustomed to letting our inner self rule our lives that we tend to see it as normal, never questioning whether it’s healthy for us.
This inner critic can kick in when you think about getting the help you need and making changes that will improve your finances. “I don’t need ‘help’; I can do it myself!” you’ll hear it say. Getting financial help may suggest that you aren’t capable, you have something missing, or you are just plain lazy or stupid.
You’ll quickly realize that a coach doesn’t ‘help’ you. A coach sees you as a whole person who is capable of unbelievable things. They don’t hold your hand like a child and they’re normal human beings who aren’t perfect. They act as a sounding board, an objective observer, offer a safe place to learn new information about money and answer questions you’ve never been able to ask anyone else. They see things clearer than you do because they step back and aren’t caught up in your daily routine. You can take more responsibility when encouraged by a coach.
Coaching will give you the opportunity to stop and reflect, gather your thoughts, sort out your priorities and focus for the coming week. The dynamics of two people working together are greater than the sum of the individuals.
What is your little voice stopping you from doing, which could be extremely beneficial for you? Write down what your mind is saying, because seeing it in black and white allows you to see more clearly.
What could your life look like right now if you’d had this kind of help when you were just starting out? What will happen 20 years from now, if you keep listening to your little voice? What are you waiting for?!?!?
Cindy Morus, http://www.mendyourmoney.com/about, is a Certified Financial Recovery Counselor specializing in showing women and their families how to achieve financial well-being and peace of mind. She is also a Certified Credit Report Reviewer, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and Certified Retirement Counselor. Contact her at 541-387-2995. She is also the publisher and editor of “Financial Fitness”, an internet gazette dedicated to helping people improve their financial fitness no matter what decisions were made in the past.